Wouldn't it be great  if we lived in a fairy-tale world?

The birds would wake us up in the morning chirping upbeat tunes. We could have beautiful gowns and jewels laid out for us everyday. Someone to draw my bath, "Yes more candles please!" and to fix my hair. A song would be hummed along through out the day. Of course a fairy godmother to grant us our every dream. What a lovely world. No struggles, never lose hope. "Snap" reality just knocked on my door.

"Melody wake up" "You don't live in a fairy-tale girl you live in real life"

Birds don't wake me up gently; instead my alarm blares much earlier then I wish. Beautiful gowns are not laid out for me. More like I stumble over my clumsy self and grab from a pile (I hope I washed). No bath drawn for me but a barely hot shower that makes me shiver on spurts of cold water.  No one to do my hair instead I fuss and fight to make it coroporate. And a fairy godmother? Right where I last saw her in fairy-tales.

I could easily become cynical about everything, be mean to everyone. Why not most of my days are spent chained to a washing machine, if not the kitchen sink. Usually covered in coffee stains and cheerios. On hold with some utility company or better yet a health insurance trying to straighten someone's mess. Then when at work we have the pleasure of dealing with selfish co-workers, employees, customers who swear they are right about everything. See it would be easy to become cynical. I'm here to ask you "Please don't!"

In no world will we ever be fully satisfied. There is always seductive and dangerous illusions that make it impossible to live consistently (Examples Snow White ate the apple, Sleeping Beauty touched the spindle, and it goes on and on). The difficulty in front of us is finding a place in-between. "A Place In This World" like Michael W Smith sang so wonderfully many years ago. A place where we can cultivate a true queens heart, full of dreams, wonder, delight, and joy right in the middle of this crazy, broken, hard to understand, disappointing world we live in.

So straighten your crown, gather your sword, and put on your best heels here are a few ways how I keep a queens heart in a not so fairy-tale world.

My greatest tool is faith. Now I know roll your eyes. I am not saying that faith in itself is  by no means an antidote to detours of life. That's why I (as a Christian woman) am not immune to building fake castles in the sky or feel trapped in the darkest dungeons. In fact faith can easily become a grand illusion when it is used to support false walls of a fake fairytale life. Nodding and pretending all is well and your faith is sky high and building your castles in the sky meanwhile you are hurting inside is not the faith I am referring to.

Equally dangerous is the real-world life cynicism full of ashes of burned-out religion that is in the deeper working of our delicate hearts. How do I know because I have been each of those examples. Instead of just giving up I threw up my hands and said I need help. I was open and honest with God telling him I don't want to be naïve a again and continue to get hurt but I also don't want to loose hope. I don't want to see things through the lenses of despair I want to see things rising. So now I carefully sift through every illusion and every reality to find elements of truth. It's when I feel like I need to settle on one of the extremes, faith shows me another way. It illuminates a new place, well actually it's an old place. It's a place that can only be seen with the eyes of the heart. It's a place where we see glimpses of the goodness of fairytales that seemed lost can fit into different view of reality. It's where the realities of our so called real world (moments that feel like pure hell) are framed in a way that lightens the darkness and removes the cynicism. It's a world where we learn to walk with a glass slipper over broken dreams. Faith can rekindle old dreams, and create new hopes. Sometimes even replace some of the old dreams we painfully watched die. Then discover unseen dreams that become bigger and more powerful than the ones we had such a hard time letting go. Faith that is stronger then despair. Faith that a mean person can not knock down. Stronger then a fleeting feeling that tells you that you are alone. Stronger than someone's opinion of you. Faith in knowing that your are precious, and wonderfully created. Faith strong enough that when you turn off the television you know that all things will work out. Faith in straightening your crown and being kind to the people who aren't kind. It's the point in when Faith becomes something more, it becomes love. The same love that God has for us, we start loving like him.  You see a queen always carries herself with grace and poise. She thinks first of her subjects and choices wisely on what is best. The world will constantly throw it's best hits. So along with faith here are a few practical ways of keeping a queens heart in a not so fairy-tale world.

*Arm yourself daily. I use scripture to prep for my day. To mentally keep my mind stable when things go array. I might never know if there is a detour in my life but feel steady when filled up with scripture to remind me who I am.

*Embrace change. This one was very hard for me since I usually don't like change unless I did the changing. I am still working on it but have come a long way. When things are changing, seasons of my life I mean then I have learnt to embrace that change. I've come to the realization that whether I want it or not things are going to change, might as well embrace it and change with grace.

*Stay in communication. Another one I had a hard time with but have now embraced. I don't mean  running around like the town crier about all that's going on but to a select few. People you know that will pray for you, lift you up and will stand with you on your dreams and goals.

*Keep Calm and Carry On! No seriously though. We sometimes have a habit for drama. Rather than rail against changes, preside over them with dignity and grace. Cultivating poise in the face of chaos is crucial for us in our positions of responsibility and leadership.

* Keep Seeing the Beauty. Don't let the negativity of this world blind you. In everything there in beauty. In every season there is beauty. Beauty from ashes. Burlap to Cashmere. Don't be blind.

* Stay Above The Fray. If certain subjects cause you angst  ie. political opinions  then stray from giving your opinion, but rather to encourage, warn and provide counsel. Advising without an opinion; not every matter merits our attention and our peace.

As a friend's facebook status reminded me this past week ...

'It's up to us to choose contentment and thankfulness now- If you can't find happiness in the ugliness, you're not going to find it in the beauty, either.' - Joanna Gaines, The Magnolia Story